A Few Ingredients For Joy
The holy grail of self help. How can we experience more happiness and joy in our lives. The fine details seem more elusive than the winning Powerball ticket but the general consensus on 'the chunk' seems to be frequency.
Frequency? If we can incorporate small doses of joy and appreciation into our lives over an extended period of time will actually change how we think. The results won't be immediate but will come if we are resilient in our approach. The Dalai Lama is in agreement with Martin Seligman's theory that the more we can experience frequent, preferably small doses of authentic joyful moments and appreciation, we will in fact bring more joy into our lives. Just about every psychologist in the field is in consensus that experience over material contributes more to happiness.
The person who earns $100,000 a year over ten years will be in a better place, emotionally, than the person who earns nothing for nine years then one million in the tenth year. Why? A regression to the mean. Whatever our initial default state of happiness is becomes the norm after a novel or traumatic event. Although the bell curves are in different parts of the graph after winning the lottery or being paralyzed in a car accident, research shows that many people regress to their norm in approximately six months time. Wow!
Improving our default state is more malleable than we think. Joyful moments can be sprinkling little helpings of joy unto others frequently to bring more of it into our own lives. I've tried it and it works. The more we increase this frequency of joyful moments the more our brain becomes used to it and the more it will expect it. This is referred to as neuroplasticity. Our brains physically change when we learn something new or create a new habit. It can be setting up goals and working to achieve them. It can be becoming engaged in activities that produce Flow. It can be an act as simple as watching the sun set and appreciating that. There are many things we can do to frequently introduce joy into our live. We need to build arsenals of joyful moments to habitually occupy that space. None of these endeavors have to be grand but frequent. Cultivate and create a culture of wellness and appreciate the smallest things you have. The frequency at which we acknowledge and show appreciation is important. Being around loved ones is a significant component to wellness as well.
There are numerous forces constantly at work looking to knock us off our 'happy pedestal' and there isn't an obvious solution to maintain this but was is needed is a conscious awareness of our emotional selves and a desire to put effort into obtaining it. Happiness is not a static thing. Once achieved, work has to be employed to regain it and on goes the cycle. Having negative feelings are normal, how it impacts our behavior is what we must be mindful of. Meditation, yoga, visualization all help to let us change how we think about things. How we think determines how we feel which then determines our behavior. How we think about things is learned behavior. We are all capable of changing or adjusting how we think.
Reference:
Authentic Happiness by Martin Seligman
Flourish by Martin Seligman
Destructive Emotions: A Scientific dialogue with the Dalai Lama by Daniel Goleman and the Dalai Lama
The Brain that Changes Itself by Norman Doidge
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
Frequency? If we can incorporate small doses of joy and appreciation into our lives over an extended period of time will actually change how we think. The results won't be immediate but will come if we are resilient in our approach. The Dalai Lama is in agreement with Martin Seligman's theory that the more we can experience frequent, preferably small doses of authentic joyful moments and appreciation, we will in fact bring more joy into our lives. Just about every psychologist in the field is in consensus that experience over material contributes more to happiness.
The person who earns $100,000 a year over ten years will be in a better place, emotionally, than the person who earns nothing for nine years then one million in the tenth year. Why? A regression to the mean. Whatever our initial default state of happiness is becomes the norm after a novel or traumatic event. Although the bell curves are in different parts of the graph after winning the lottery or being paralyzed in a car accident, research shows that many people regress to their norm in approximately six months time. Wow!
Improving our default state is more malleable than we think. Joyful moments can be sprinkling little helpings of joy unto others frequently to bring more of it into our own lives. I've tried it and it works. The more we increase this frequency of joyful moments the more our brain becomes used to it and the more it will expect it. This is referred to as neuroplasticity. Our brains physically change when we learn something new or create a new habit. It can be setting up goals and working to achieve them. It can be becoming engaged in activities that produce Flow. It can be an act as simple as watching the sun set and appreciating that. There are many things we can do to frequently introduce joy into our live. We need to build arsenals of joyful moments to habitually occupy that space. None of these endeavors have to be grand but frequent. Cultivate and create a culture of wellness and appreciate the smallest things you have. The frequency at which we acknowledge and show appreciation is important. Being around loved ones is a significant component to wellness as well.
There are numerous forces constantly at work looking to knock us off our 'happy pedestal' and there isn't an obvious solution to maintain this but was is needed is a conscious awareness of our emotional selves and a desire to put effort into obtaining it. Happiness is not a static thing. Once achieved, work has to be employed to regain it and on goes the cycle. Having negative feelings are normal, how it impacts our behavior is what we must be mindful of. Meditation, yoga, visualization all help to let us change how we think about things. How we think determines how we feel which then determines our behavior. How we think about things is learned behavior. We are all capable of changing or adjusting how we think.
Reference:
Authentic Happiness by Martin Seligman
Flourish by Martin Seligman
Destructive Emotions: A Scientific dialogue with the Dalai Lama by Daniel Goleman and the Dalai Lama
The Brain that Changes Itself by Norman Doidge
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
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