Communication In Conflict
Communication is a skill. To be a good communicator requires a highly developed skill set few people master and even fewer practice.To effectively communicate through conflict means to do more than being able to find the right words to express your position. One has to be able to read and receive what is being expressed effectively to form a valid response and this requires active listening.
Active listening is more than just hearing what someone is saying. It involves an emotional component to be able to feel where the person is coming from. Some refer to this as empathy. One of the biggest traps we all fall into is believing we know what we don't know. We all can have a tendency to this while communicating particularly when communicating in conflict. Why do I say while in conflict? Because once our emotional state is heightened, things get hot. Things speed up and we have a tendency to operate from a defensive position without even realizing it. We create all kinds of narratives then immediately jump into a default script and at this point we aren't even listening, we are reacting and simply waiting for our turn to speak.
I am as guilty of this as anyone. But I have learned, and practiced, to become a better listener and have drilled into my dense skull that I don't know what I think I know. We all have our own way of communicating and expressing the same emotions and feelings. This practice requires a patience that few of us have but it is worth developing. There are few things more important, and fulfilling, than being able to effectively communicate especially to loved ones.
There will be times this requires us to express unpleasant feelings or opinions and what is important is that whomever you are communicating with understands you are coming from a place of love. To effectively convey this one has to understand what that means to the other person. Tone, body language, verbiage all come into play and have to be customized for each individual. If you think you can take a one step approach and apply that to be able to effectively communicate with everyone you are sorely mistaken.
Communicating effectively is something that is important to me so I work to develop this skill on a regular basis. I think this social skill works to bring people together and form cohesion and more importantly gives people the safe space to be able to agree to disagree which is another skill set unto itself.
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
Active listening is more than just hearing what someone is saying. It involves an emotional component to be able to feel where the person is coming from. Some refer to this as empathy. One of the biggest traps we all fall into is believing we know what we don't know. We all can have a tendency to this while communicating particularly when communicating in conflict. Why do I say while in conflict? Because once our emotional state is heightened, things get hot. Things speed up and we have a tendency to operate from a defensive position without even realizing it. We create all kinds of narratives then immediately jump into a default script and at this point we aren't even listening, we are reacting and simply waiting for our turn to speak.
I am as guilty of this as anyone. But I have learned, and practiced, to become a better listener and have drilled into my dense skull that I don't know what I think I know. We all have our own way of communicating and expressing the same emotions and feelings. This practice requires a patience that few of us have but it is worth developing. There are few things more important, and fulfilling, than being able to effectively communicate especially to loved ones.
There will be times this requires us to express unpleasant feelings or opinions and what is important is that whomever you are communicating with understands you are coming from a place of love. To effectively convey this one has to understand what that means to the other person. Tone, body language, verbiage all come into play and have to be customized for each individual. If you think you can take a one step approach and apply that to be able to effectively communicate with everyone you are sorely mistaken.
Communicating effectively is something that is important to me so I work to develop this skill on a regular basis. I think this social skill works to bring people together and form cohesion and more importantly gives people the safe space to be able to agree to disagree which is another skill set unto itself.
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
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