The Expectation
Probably the single biggest predictor of any accomplishment in life could be how the expectation was managed. We are all familiar with expectations. We all have them. For ourselves, for others, our jobs, our lives, our relationships, but how much thought have you given to managing them? I personally know this is an area I need a lot of work in.
An expectation is that thing that is both a blessing and a curse. It is all in the application of it. Unrealistic expectations are pretty much a deathblow to anything. Whether it is a new found love, a marriage, a career, or life in general. Expectations are also those things that can propel us to achieve things beyond our wildest dreams and confined levels of imagination. So how do we apply them in a way that propels us and doesn't make us the recipient of a death blow?
For one thing, being present in the moment is a useful exercise. Practicing presence keeps us in the moment and stops us from projecting. Unfortunately this has limited power as many of us know and I honestly do not know the secret to managing our expectations.
I had the privilege of going on a few dates with an incredible woman these past few months. Following my divorce I had been pretty much dead in a romantic and intimate sense but had that part of me resurrected by this woman. Like many who have experienced Colpi di fulmine, rational thinking and behavior goes out the window. For those whose Italian may be lacking, Colpi di fulmine is the Italian saying referred to as the thunderbolt of love. Love at first sight, just a more powerful version. Think Michael Corleone while he was hiding in Sicily. Needless to say my expectations couldn't help get the best of me, at least in my head anyway, even though I knew better than to think like this. I will spare the readers the details. So what gives?
Our concepts or narratives that govern our lives are all conditioned elements that we all learn. This also means we can unlearn them. The power comes in the decision to make the choice. Far easier said than done as I can personally attest to but I do consistently work to subscribe to the mindest of responsibility. To take responsibility for each and every component of your life is truly empowering. It removes blame and moves you to take action to make change. Change is good, it is a vehicle to growth.
The sincerity of the expectation we place on ourselves, on others, and on life in general will determine what types of fruits our labors will provide. When we want what is best for someone else and place upon that the proper expectation, good things happen. Likewise with ourselves.
We live in a time where more people are living in abundance than at any time in this country's history yet have more people unhappy and dissatisfied with their relationships, marriages, jobs, lives etc. Loneliness is rampant in a time where technology supposedly has people more connected than ever. I don't offer solutions but the mindset of context, meaning, if you are seeking something and you are not finding what you seek, you have two options. Retool and change your strategy and tactic, or change your expectation.
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
An expectation is that thing that is both a blessing and a curse. It is all in the application of it. Unrealistic expectations are pretty much a deathblow to anything. Whether it is a new found love, a marriage, a career, or life in general. Expectations are also those things that can propel us to achieve things beyond our wildest dreams and confined levels of imagination. So how do we apply them in a way that propels us and doesn't make us the recipient of a death blow?
For one thing, being present in the moment is a useful exercise. Practicing presence keeps us in the moment and stops us from projecting. Unfortunately this has limited power as many of us know and I honestly do not know the secret to managing our expectations.
I had the privilege of going on a few dates with an incredible woman these past few months. Following my divorce I had been pretty much dead in a romantic and intimate sense but had that part of me resurrected by this woman. Like many who have experienced Colpi di fulmine, rational thinking and behavior goes out the window. For those whose Italian may be lacking, Colpi di fulmine is the Italian saying referred to as the thunderbolt of love. Love at first sight, just a more powerful version. Think Michael Corleone while he was hiding in Sicily. Needless to say my expectations couldn't help get the best of me, at least in my head anyway, even though I knew better than to think like this. I will spare the readers the details. So what gives?
Our concepts or narratives that govern our lives are all conditioned elements that we all learn. This also means we can unlearn them. The power comes in the decision to make the choice. Far easier said than done as I can personally attest to but I do consistently work to subscribe to the mindest of responsibility. To take responsibility for each and every component of your life is truly empowering. It removes blame and moves you to take action to make change. Change is good, it is a vehicle to growth.
The sincerity of the expectation we place on ourselves, on others, and on life in general will determine what types of fruits our labors will provide. When we want what is best for someone else and place upon that the proper expectation, good things happen. Likewise with ourselves.
We live in a time where more people are living in abundance than at any time in this country's history yet have more people unhappy and dissatisfied with their relationships, marriages, jobs, lives etc. Loneliness is rampant in a time where technology supposedly has people more connected than ever. I don't offer solutions but the mindset of context, meaning, if you are seeking something and you are not finding what you seek, you have two options. Retool and change your strategy and tactic, or change your expectation.
#elliotyi
#paradigmleft
#habits
#mindset
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